“When you first meet somebody, you find out they like you, first of all. A friend of theirs says, ‘He/she really really likes you.’ And it kills you, floors you, sends you to the ground; you gotta pick yourself off of the ground.
Then, you get their phone number and you call them up, right? And you say, ‘Yeah, that was a great phone conversation. Can I see you sometime?’ And they say this…
They say, ‘I’d like that.’
‘I’d like that’ makes you fall on the floor again. Your heart’s about to stop because of, ‘I’d like that.’ Nothing feels better than ‘I’d like that.’
So now, your blood pressure’s going; you’re six feet off the ground. You can’t sleep because of, ‘I’d like that.’ So then you hang out for a while and you call and you talk on the phone all the time, and then you drop the bomb, or what feels like the bomb.
And you say, ‘You know what? I’ve been thinking about you a lot.’ And she goes, *GASP* and you go, ‘What happened?’ and she goes, ‘I’m sorry, I just, I just, I just, it’s…I’ve been thinking about you too.’
Bam! Higher into the sky, but now ‘I’d like that’ is DONE. And now you’re up to, ‘I’m thinking about you.’ Then, however number of months pass; makes you comfortable saying it. You say, ‘I gotta tell you something,’ and they go ‘what?’
And you go, ‘I’m in love with you.’
And nothing in the world sounds better than, ‘I’m in love with you.’ And then maybe she starts crying or maybe he goes *GASP* and all of a sudden you’re like, “Ah, man..” But NOW, what doesn’t work? ‘I’d like that,’ and ‘I’ve been thinking about you.’ Now we’re on, ‘I’m in love with you.’
Then maybe someday we’ll move to ‘I love you’…fast forward; now you’re like ‘I love you A LOT! I love you more than anything in life’ and now ‘I love you’ doesn’t work. It’s a threshold; it keeps moving up…
Fast forward six months, six weeks, whatever the case may be; and now you’re on, ‘I want to marry you, I want to impregnate you with my love; I wanna just send my love to you. Damn it, words don’t work anymore.’
And then you say THIS line, and you know you’ve used this line before. ‘I JUST WISH THEY PUT A NEW WORD IN THE DICTIONARY BIGGER THAN LOVE BECAUSE LOVE DOESN’T DESCRIBE WHAT I FEEL!!’
And so then, now he/she starts asking, ‘Do you love me?’ and you start going, ‘OF COURSE I LOVE YOU!’ ‘Well, say it!’ And then it becomes, ‘Say it twice! Say it THREE TIMES!’
And then you cross a REALLY interesting point where, all of a sudden, it becomes, ‘I hate you, I hate you…’ and you go, ‘Oh my god, she HATES me!’ and then it’s like, ‘I hate you more than anything!’ and then it’s like, ‘We’re over!’ and then, ‘NO WE’RE NOT!’ and then, ‘YES WE ARE!’ and now the words completely do not work at all, you’re left with NOTHING. You’re throwing punches underwater, you’re DONE.”
You know what the moral of that story is, if there is one? Never ever ever EVER underestimate the power of ‘I’d like that’…
